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Help Desk Confessionals

I'm a systems administrator who provides tech support, data analysis, and report generation for about 300 users. No support staff. No other help. Just me.

The Hummer H2 Salute

Thursday, April 21, 2005

(from fuh2.com)

Guess I'm not the only one who hates these pompous gas-guzzlers.
posted by Carl from L.A., 9:06 AM | link | 0 comments |

Whitney’s Hotline is HOT

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

An interesting story from LARADIO.com...

(Preface: Whitney Allen is a disc jockey in KZLA, a country station in Los Angeles. "Hotlines" are direct lines to the radio station control room.)

* * * * * * * * * * * *

“At KZLA, as at most studios, we have numerous hotlines,” emailed afternooner Whitney Allen. “About four people have the number, which means I get more wrong numbers and sales pitches on that line than anything else.

One afternoon around 6:20 p.m. the super secret hotline rings.

Male Caller: Hello
Me: Hello
Male Caller: Hello
Me: Hello
Male Caller: Who's this?
Me: Uh uh, you called me. You tell me who YOU are first.

Well, he won't budge, continues to ask me where I am, what I do and at last I say, ‘Ya know, I'm not telling you anything if you don't tell me who you are. He won't tell me anything so I say, ‘See ya’ and hang up.

Line rings AGAIN. Same conversation, but shorter. Until I say, ‘ya know, I got no time for this’ and hang up again.

Line rings AGAIN I let it ring for a good three minutes. This guy is NOT giving up, so what the heck, I answer again, but I'm getting all ticked off, I'm doing a contest and I figure this guy just has my wrong number on redial and is getting some sort of weird kick out of this.

Male Caller: Just tell me who you are or where you are.
Me: Look, you will NEVER get that fucking information, OK? YOU fucking called me and you want all sorts of information on ME? We've gone through this like 3 times now and I'm not fucking telling you anything unless you tell me who YOU are.
Male Caller: This is Tommy Lasorda and I'm just wondering why your number is in my phone. Now, you tell me who you are, you promised.

Well, the blood has DRAINED from my face, my knees have BUCKLED I am TOTALLY HORRIFIED that I have just CUSSED OUT one of my IDOLS since childhood!! My intern Janice who is a HUGE baseball fan throws her hand over her mouth and starts crying while laughing.

At last I can speak, but barely. ‘I'm Whitney Allen, and I can't believe I just cussed out Tommy Lasorda, I want to kill myself.’

‘Whitney Allen,’ Tommy said, ‘Don't you worry, I don't even know what those words mean.’

It turns out Tommy was on Peter Tilden's morning show that morning, Opening Day. I congratulated Tommy on a fabulous win. He asked me if I was at the game, told him I would be there opening night and he told me to come on by and say hello. I told him he had NO idea how awful I felt. He signed my high school yearbook. He signed a baseball that I have. I used to watch him coach third base. He could NOT have been any kinder. I am still mortified.”
posted by Carl from L.A., 8:46 AM | link | 0 comments |

What Carl's Doing on His First Class-Free Monday

Monday, April 18, 2005

For your amusement...
  • Went to bed the night before later than normal (11:30 p.m.). Set alarm for 3:40 a.m.
  • Alarm went off. Snoozed till 4:10 a.m.
  • Left home at 4:40 a.m. - earlier than when I was teaching at 5:45 a.m., but then I was trying to get to work by 5 a.m. today.
  • Got to work by 5:15 a.m. 15 minutes late!
  • Leaving office at 1 p.m. today to run work-related errand. Plan on making it home by 3 p.m.
  • Packing and helping Lori with Amanda and Russell until they go to bed tonight.
posted by Carl from L.A., 10:44 AM | link | 0 comments |

A Five-Question Interview

Friday, April 15, 2005

1. You've washed up on a desert island. Other things washed up with you. You look in your pack to find you have some food, water, knife, flint and steel, instructions on how to make your own bow and arrow, a desert survival guide, and an entertaining novel to read. What one thing do you wish was in your pack (and you can't pick any people)? Why?

A powered-up satellite phone with GPS - I ain't staying on no desert island!

2. I noticed you have a blog about your two children. Tell me the decision process about why you preferred to use their real names, and to post pictures of them. And weren't you scared to do so?

Pretty much up until now, the only people care to read about my kids are family relatives, especially those from out of state and overseas. What is it that I need to be scared of from people who see them on line versus people who see them in person? Identity theft? By the way, anyone who wants to buy my kids something can write them a check with their real name (as provided). Address provided upon request.

3. Are you the same religion now as you were raised to be? Why/Why not?

No. I was born and raised Catholic but now embrace the teachings of fundamental Christianity. (But then I also can't stand other fundamental Christians.) Why? Do this test to Catholics who are exiting a mass: ask them what the readings were and what the homily was about. No one would be able to tell you.

4. If you were to receive your all-time favorite gift, what would it be? It can be anything. Why?

I'd like a surprise party. Never had one thrown for me.

5. You called yourself a lurker. How long have you been lurking, and how did you get here in the first place?

I found "People are Stupid" awhile ago from "Next Blog" - it's a great little button, isn't it? I am interested to find out just how stupid people are.


For the blog-a-thon:
I'll offer to interview the next how many ever people respond to this post, and here's how it works:
1. Leave me a comment saying 'interview me', if you'd like to be interviewed.
2. I will respond by asking you five questions here. They will be different questions than the ones above.
3. You'll update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You'll include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you'll ask them five questions.
posted by Carl from L.A., 12:54 PM | link | 0 comments |

Hilarious Movie on Driving

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Especial Bruno Bozzetto

Anyone who drives a lot, especially in a city L.A., would be thoroughly amused by this.
posted by Carl from L.A., 1:46 PM | link | 0 comments |

BBC NEWS | Entertainment | TV and Radio | Wiggles take Kidman's rich title

posted by Carl from L.A., 7:13 AM | link | 0 comments |

Craft Corner Deathmatch

Monday, April 04, 2005

I saw this show over the weekend. Is this for real?? This is WWE for crafting, complete with an obnoxious host and audience sitting behind cages. This is the Iron Chef of crafting, complete with commentatory during 10-minute crafting competitions, and a dual with the frightful (I'm serious - she looks scary) "Craft Lady of Steel". The outrageousness of this competition and the larger-than-life host was enough to get me to watch the entire three-hour marathon. Amber, the stage assistant, was hilarious. Posted by Hello
posted by Carl from L.A., 1:41 PM | link | 0 comments |